IS there anyone in the world you like totally? As in, approve everything about that person, all the time? Even if you are wildly, obsessively in all consuming love? Even if you have your rose-tinted glasses pushed right back up your nose? Can you honestly say there is nothing at all about your loved one you would rather change?
Surely not. It cannot be possible to like everything about even the one person you love most in the world

What should you do with rest of your life? About three thousand years ago, a Jewish king named Solomon aired his opinion on the subject. As he put it, he “wanted to see what was worthwhile for men to do under heaven during the few days of their lives”.
   Solomon was an interesting character, and he had a lot going for him. He was intelligent. Indeed, this sageking still has the reputation of being the “wisest man who ever lived”.
   He also had the means to do practically anything he wanted to do. In his old age, Solomon found time to reflect on his lifelong experiences. And he passed his thoughts down in writing. He starts off by telling us that everything in life is meaningless.
   “I know, because I have seen it all. You name it, I’ve done it. I not only did it, but I did it in a big time, kingly fashion. I denied myself nothing, nothing at all. But looking back on it now, I can tell you none of it amounted to a hill of beans.”
   “What do you think is worthwhile in life? The pursuit of pleasure? I had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines. I had music from men and women singers; all the wine I could drink; and a palace full of people falling all over themselves doing everything they could think of to get in my good graces.
   “Sure, it is enjoyable up to a point. But when you get everything you want whenever you want it, you quickly discover how meaningless pleasure really is.
   “Here is what I’ve learned: Whenever you seek pleasure, pleasure eludes you. The only way you may find pleasure is by seeking something else first. It could be nothing more than paying someone a sincere compliment, or giving someone a hand with an unpleasant task.
   “The idea is that when you least expect it, happiness suddenly bubbles up like a well inside of you. You don’t find pleasure; pleasure finds you. Pursuing pleasure is like chasing after the wind.
   “If not pleasure, then what? Wealth? Do you think you should dedicate your life to the pursuit of wealth? I had houses, vineyards, gardens, parks, fruit trees, reservoirs watering groves of trees, slaves, more herds and flocks than anyone in Jerusalem, horses and chariots, and more silver and gold than anyone can imagine. I had it all. But if money and things could buy happiness, then I would have been the happiest man that ever lived.
   “But what did I discover? Just this: Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income. A rich man doesn’t even sleep well at night. He’s too worried about his money.
   “Money has its uses, but don’t lose perspective. We were born naked, and when we die, we’re going to take with us just what we brought into this world. Whatever we acquire will be left to someone who had not worked for it.”
   If neither pleasure nor wealth are worthwhile pursuits, how about the scholarly pursuit of knowledge?
   “Oh yes, I spent a great deal of time in study. I learned everything I could about every subject under the sun. That’s how I got my reputation for wisdom. It didn’t fall out of a tree, you know. What did I find out? Only this: The more you learn, the more you discover there is to know. Even the brightest of us are ignorant of many things. Certainly, wisdom is better than foolishness, but remember, in a few years, both the wise man and the fool wind up in the grave. Before long both are forgotten.”
   So, pleasure, wealth, and knowledge all have limited value. What’s left? Work? “Yes, I worked. I built houses, planted vineyards, gardens, parks, fruit trees, and groves of trees. I delighted in my work. That was my reward.
   “Of course, it was merely a temporary ‘feel-good-about-it’ sort of thing. In the long run, all of our toil is useless. Whatever you make, you can’t take with you. And in due course, whatever we create will be torn down or destroyed and soon forgotten.”
   So, the wise man threw a wet blanket over most of the things people devote themselves to today. Then what should we do? How should we spend our brief time on earth?
   The answer is simple: “A man can do nothing better than to eat, drink and find satisfaction in work. Enjoy life with the one you love. Be happy and do good as long as you live. Whatever you do, do it with all the might because you never know when life might end.
   “While we are young, enjoy life as much as possible. But don’t forget, God will judge everything we do. The years slip by quickly. Infants turn into youths, youths into adults, adults into middle age, and middle age into old age. It doesn’t take long at all.
   “All too soon, the troubles and afflictions of age sap the strength and weaken the mind. Then death calls your number and body returns to the ground from where it came, and soul returns to God who gave it.”
   Solomon concludes his advice with this warning: “God will bring every deed into judgment including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil. God will bring to judgment both the righteous and the wicked.”
   Has Solomon’s 3,000-year-old advice stood the test of time?
   Some things have changed. Primarily, we have more gadgets these days than they had back in his time. But our basic choices remain the same. We can dedicate our lives to pleasure, money or possessions, or knowledge, or work. Then again when we reflect on the brevity of life, the certainty of death, and the promise of judgment, we might decide Solomon knew what he was talking about.
   But what about God judging the good and wicked? The moral law certainly implies that God cares about us, what we do with our lives, and the choices we make. Also our longing for justice, often frustrated in this life, leads us to believe, we will get whatever we are due in the world to come.
   By the end of the book, Solomon reaches a different conclusion: Life has a point after all. Our sojourn can best be described as a sort of boot camp or school of hard knocks. We are here to learn. Learn what? Learn that pleasures, money, possessions, knowledge, and work all have only limited value. None of these pursuits should be the focal point of our lives.
   Our primary task is to develop character, that is, a certain type of character. Earth, we discover, is nothing more than a large training centre for character. Those who graduate have learned their lessons on: fair play, unselfishness, humility, courage, faithfulness, honesty, truthfulness, and treating others with respect.

 By : Jerry Boone

Source : sunday times

Life is full of risks. There is a certain element of risk taking that is inherent in every venture we undertake whether it is in business, or in marriage, in a profession or in athletics. We never have complete security within ourselves. For we know that every moment we live, our lives are in constant danger. A stray bullet may hit us, a car emerging out of nowhere may crush us, and a slip of the foot may result in our death. So life is unpredictable. We get no warning, we are afforded no red alert, and we get no second chance at life.
And we might as well face the fact that our life is a dying life. As soon as we are born, we begin to die and every day we manage to somehow survive, we have only gained another step towards our grave. Each morning when we wake up from a refreshing sleep, we have died a little during the night. As we go through the streets of the city, we are dying a little. As we go about our business on the job, we are dying a little. In essence, we are living in the land of the dying.
It will help you to accept life on its own terms rather than struggle against it. Identify and move from
the limiting and conflicting, either/or,black or white,all or nothing illusory perception of life to an attitude that is open to all aspects of reality. We do this by accepting life on its own terms

 

Spirituality brings purpose and meaning to life, and as we develop it, we grow in wisdom and love. We begin to experience a sense of awe, a sense of connection to all of life, and a deep reverence for the Divine. We find ourselves moved to prayers of gratitude and moments of spontaneous worship. Spirituality calls a human being to a life of trust and service.
    When our spirituality is nurtured and vibrant, we are connected. This connection is both a sense of relationship to the Creator, Great Spirit, or God (divine force), as well as a relationship to all people and to Mother Earth (our life-giving environment). Spirituality takes us beyond our egocentered lives by expanding our hearts with compassion towards all.
    Spirituality does not dwell in a realm apart. It is not an extracurricular activity. Spirituality involves a reverent attitude toward all things because it awakens us to a divine presence in all things. In this way of seeing and being, all things and persons are interconnected and interdependent. In the Sioux native language, the word for the Great Spirit is Wakan, which means ‘the great mystery.’ Yet this spirit, full of mystery, is every bit as real as the visible, tangible world.
    It is important to differentiate spirituality from religion. Some people have rejected religion in order to escape what they consider to be oppressive rules and regulations. In the
process, however, many lose the great gifts of joy and compassion that spirituality brings.
    Religion and spirituality are related and intertwined, but they are not the same. A person may experience spirituality without being a member of any specific religious affiliation, and even the most religious person may feel spiritually bereft. The true purpose of religion is to enhance spirituality through ritual and practice. This is accomplished when a person approaches his or her religion as a way to enter the great mystery, to become aware of the sacredness of all life.
    Religion can become a barrier to spirituality when it insists on narrow, judgmental dogma, and estranges its followers from a sense of connection with the Divine. Religion serves us best as a vehicle to nourish and develop our spirituality.
    It is possible, however, to get too caught up in the vehicle, the religious practice, while losing sight of the destination, spirituality, which is communion with the Divine and compassion for all. For modern, academically oriented professionals, like physicians and health care workers, spirituality is often a difficult subject.
    Their training is framed by science. They depend on logical, analytical, and rational approaches, and for good reason. These approaches have successfully ushered in a host of lifechanging improvements in health care and technology. While honouring science and the mind, our cultural tendency urges us to devalue belief and mystery, but the result is costly: They are left spiritually starved and out of balance.
    Some of life’s most difficult questions are the spiritual ones. What is the purpose of life? Where does real meaning come from? What is of real value in our lives? If there truly is a God who loves us, how could there be so much suffering and unfairness in the world? Part of our addiction to the busyness of life is an attempt to prevent ourselves from thinking about our mortality, the inevitable fact of our own death. But when we keep ourselves too busy to consider the purpose of our existence, our lives cease to have meaning. Strangely, it is only when we fully accept the reality of our mortality that we truly begin to live. This is the point at which we begin to enter into and learn about the spiritual dimension of our humanity. 

At this point, you might ask yourself several questions to help assess your own spirituality. Do i have a sense of connection with the Divine? Do i feel compassion for others? Do i feel awe and reverence? Do i live a life of trust? Am i called to service? Is prayer or meditation an important part of my life?    As French philosopher Pierre Teilhard de Chardin remarked, “We are not physical beings having a spiritual experience, but spiritual beings having a physical experience.” Our spirituality is our true essence. It is that part of our life which relates to our soul, which from a spiritual perspective is connected to the Divine and is infinite. This lifetime is but the physical experience of our deeper reality, our spirit, which is our fundamental nature. 

God can help manage your medication Spirituality helps older black American women with high blood pressure stick to the drug regimens that keep the condition under control, new research suggests. Older black Americans tend to have poorer anti-hypertensive medication adherence than either younger blacks or white patients, even though adherence helps reduce hypertension-related health problems and deaths, noted a team from the University of Pennsylvania School of Nursing.    This study included 21 black women, average age 73, who were members of a Programme of All Inclusive Care for the Elderly. The women had been diagnosed with hypertension for an average of 16.7 years, and they were taking an average of 3.3 prescriptions to battle the condition. All the women said they used their spirituality to manage their medication adherence. As part of this process, identified as ‘Partnering with God to Manage My Medications,’ the women accepted personal responsibility for adhering to their medication regimen and used their spirituality as a resource to make decisions to remain adherent, to cope with medication side effects, and to increase their ability to deal with barriers that kept them from sticking with their medicines. It must now pass through all the necessary committees for final approval including the Senate and Governor of the State.

    by ALAN SHELTON

source: sunday times.